Before she bleached her hair (Image Source).
In anticipation for the impending arrival of said secret, I've begun to compile a list of possibilities. So, before Miley can air her family's dirty laundry to the starving public, I present to you... Well, as I stated a sentence ago, a list of possible secrets she could relay.
1) The goatee gracing Billy Ray Cyrus' lower lip covers up the trans-communication device that forwards a live feed from Earth to Sector X-3 where his fellow Gorblachs are actively preparing for an all-scale invasion.
Careful not to confuse Gorblahs with these here Gelgameks (Image Source).
Only a few more souls before his resurrection is complete (Image Source).
He's had no control over his bowels since that fateful day (Image Source).
Don't let the accent fool you (Image Source).
I actually had a heated argument with a friend whether they were different people.
I was on the losing side (Image Source).
Figured I'd ruin your day by posting this rage-inducing pic (Image Source).
Too afraid to look up a picture because I'm searching for all of these at work.
Already ran into a naked picture of Minnie Mouse while googling "Disney Steals Souls".
So, there you have it. Just remember, when Miley reveals any of the aforementioned statements, you heard it here first at Chiz Chat!
This better boost my site traffic. I've hit all the topics that tweens are talking about, right? Ah, who am I kidding? I'm selling out like a Tickle-Me Elmo on Black Friday. Damn, this is a whole new low for me. Oh well, here's hoping TMZ finds room for me on their panel of lifeless nerds.