To: email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org
CC: email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org
Subject: ESCAPE: Subject 324 (URGENT)
Date: 11.21.2023 [Nov. 21]
I regret to inform you that, due to my unforgivable actions, the turkey cloning lab has suffered a breach.
I'm writing this message from the confines of my office. I've engaged the security traps in the lab and activated the pressurized gates to ensure the infestation does not escape the premises. You must obey my orders: leave the lab security settings engaged. Disregard the horrifying sounds that may eminate from the lab; it's better to imagine than to witness the horror that I have mistakenly created. I must remain here to accept the consequences of my sins but not before you hear me out.
I had the best intentions in mind. The turkey cloning line was progressing wonderfully. We had nearly perfected the science of producing an unlimited supply of turkeys at such a low cost that it would drastically reduce the price of turkeys in stores. But why stop there? I worked tirelessly to come up with a formula to produce much larger turkeys using the same amount of matter. All that was required was the addition of a single, dead, human skin cell. A genetically enhanced turkey derived from such an abundant material would abolish world hunger. But I wasn't prepared for what was to follow.
I thought I had perfected the formula, but when I started the automated production line, the creatures that emerged from the assembly were the offspring of some abomination sent from the depths of hell itself.
Their heads were mutated into thick stumps. Their legs were bony and lacking any sign of muscle yet showed no strain in supporting the girth of this enormous beast. But worst of all were the enlongated and horrifically defined vertebrae that protruded from the creature's spine. It didn't take long to recognize that these deformed monsters posed a threat.
I don't have much time as the beasts have nearly broken down the barred door to my office.
But please forgive my actions, I was only trying to help.
And tell my family I said... Happy Thanksgiving.
FILE: I've attached a screenshot of the security feed for those without a weak stomach. You can see why I can't leave the lab alive.