Friday, April 20, 2012

R is for Ransom Note


Hey, it’s Choz of the 31st Century again. I’m still trapped in this shit era where children choke themselves to get high and adults find this noise they call “Coldplay” inspiring. I can’t stand the people here. They insistently ask me about the weather when they can simply look outside. These people are retarded!

Anyway, I found a very interesting note in the mailbox today whilst returning from Chiz’s extremely boring, dead-end job. Here’s what it read:


I couldn’t believe it! Chiz is alive! However, I knew this note was an obvious ruse to lure me into an ambush. I immediately started devising a plot to get Chiz back so that I may relinquish myself from this taxing challenge. I had almost perfected my grand scheme, when I found the second half of the note:


Well, I suppose I must venture over to this house to retrieve Chiz so that I may begin work on constructing a new time machine. ‘Til next time!

24 comments:

  1. Comic sans - The true font of kidnappers!

    I'm enjoying this new narrative you've got going. I can't wait to find out what happens next in the Chiz/Choz saga!

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    1. I'm glad! Unfortunately, the epic conclusion is probably next post.

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  2. Nice try. I'm back and feeling a little better. You better fess up and stick it out. None of this killing Chiz off to get out of A to Z.

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    1. I'm glad that you're feeling better! And, Chiz will be back. Just you wait and see.

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  3. Replies
    1. Don't look at me; it was Choz who wrote it. I think our era is too smart if anything.

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  4. Come back and finish what you started, you slacker! If the rest of us have to do it, so do you! On 2nd thoughts, just thinking about all those difficult letters at the end of the alphabet make me think maybe you have the right idea ... where are those cheetos?

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    1. Don't worry. You'll see the epic twist during tomorrow's post (I just need to think of one first). As for the Cheetos, they're lodged somewhere in my esophagus.

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    2. LOL Nothing like setting yourself up for hard work ... epic twist ... shall look forward to it!

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  5. If someone says its not a trap it can't be a trap! I await the return of Chiz.

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    1. Oh, Chiz will return. Oh, yes, he will return. He will. I'm certain of it. Return he shall...

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  6. I literally had Cool Ranch Doritos in my mouth as I read this. It was a very weird experience.

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    1. Ain't no other chip like it (I included Cheetos and Cool Ranch Doritos assuming someone would be eating either or).

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  7. "Lights out, Guerilla Radio...turn that shit up!" YEAH!

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  8. Can I be kidnapped too...just 'til the challenge is over. hahaha I like Cheetos. I agree with Bersercules... it's a trap. But Cool Ranch Doritos are involved so you have to risk it.

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    1. As long as I get Cool Ranch Doritos, I don't care if it's a trap.

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  9. The time machine worked great, by the way.

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    1. Thank you. I invented it all on my own after a night of too much Chinese food.

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    2. Prilosec and now the Time Machine brought you you by Chinese Food!

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  10. Oh dear... now I shall be able to think of nothing else but his plight while I carry on with my incredibly interesting afternoon of getting the food shopping. What if buy something inappropriate and fattening through stress? I shall blame you. And him.

    If you go visit on the A-Z, I'm leaving you my A-Z link as blogger always identifies me as my shared blog with other poets - my A-Z is this one: http://www.lizbrownleepoet.com

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    1. Cool Ranch Doritos aren't fattening. Science says so.

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