So, I have a slut for a dog. Many people would refer to him as a Shiba Inu, but I see through his façade. He’s a no good, filthy harlot.
Whenever I’m home alone with Pogo, he has no problem jumping on my lap and receiving a good head scratch. However, the issue is when others are around. He instantly turns into an attention-seeking slut. Despite how I beckon his name, he ignores my call and prances around the room like he’s some sort of marvel to gawk at. Where was this dog a minute ago before everyone arrived? Oh, we’re not worthy of your greatness! Get over yourself, Pogo! I hope you get around to reading this and feel like a little skank! Yet, regardless of his obvious display of narcissism, people actually give him the attention he wrongfully deserves. He struts across the room with his curly tail perked up; flashing his anus to everyone he passes. How can they not see that he’s using them?
Recently, I caught him licking a person. He was slowly caressing her leg with his tongue. If it weren’t for my intervention, he’d be jackhammering her leg until it fractured.
Later, after everyone had left, he put on the same ol’ front I’ve seen a million times before and tries to get cozy with me. It’s like he had no recollection of how he just acted. How he treated me like a peon far below his empire of pats and compliments. He then tried to win me over my licking my hand, but I pulled away. I’m not falling for his deception anymore.
Yeah, that's me trying to make my dog look slutty.
Now, I’ve got a rash where he managed to sneak a lick on my hand. I’ve scheduled an appointment at a clinic, but there’s no use; I already know it’s herpes contracted from that girl he was slobbering over.
Unfortunately, we’re still not talking. He’s still acting like he has no idea what he did. Pogo’s playing his oh-so-common dog-card. He thinks that he can play stupid because he’s an animal, but I know he’s realized the error of his ways; he’s just too stubborn to admit that he acted foolishly.
Here’s hoping he eventually breaks.