While ordering my fourth Dunkin Donuts coffee of the day, I noticed an unfamiliar employee working the counter. I ordered my usual “medium-blueberry-iced-coffee-with-milk-n-sugar.” It wasn’t hard to tell that this old woman was straight off the boat. She copied my order back to me to verify if it was correct. “You want a brooberry ice coffee wit mirk and soda.” Wait… soda? Well since she probably wasn’t accustomed to American culture, I replied, “no, sugar.” To which she replied “what kind?” I hesitated and said “regular sugar?” So she left the counter and headed to the fridge and pointed at a Coca-Cola. I didn’t really know what to do. Just then, a follow employee, who was probably smelling fahts in the back, came to my aid and corrected her. I finally got my coffee and exited the building to the sounds of learning.
I sipped on my coffee in enjoyment as I galloped back to my wonderful job. But then I stopped… “No fucking way,” I thought. Little did I realize, that foreign lady was a freaking genius! They make coffee flavored caffeinated beverages; why not make soda flavored coffee then? It would have the roasted flavor of coffee mixed with the fizzy kick of a soda. I should’ve fucking listen to her. With the combination of my lack of business sense but amazing skill of bullshitting and her surreal sense of innovation, we could make millions... Fuckin’ billions.